(This post may have TMI – if you get offended easily – please stop reading now)
Life went back to normal….but in the back of my mind I couldn’t help but think “What if I really did have a miscarriage?” So finally in March of 2009 I decided to talk to Brian about it. My heart was heavy and knowing that I would probably have issues getting pregnant I suggested maybe we just start “officially” trying now. He was on board. Now I have no clue WHY I remember this exact date, but I do. It was March 15, 2009.
We also had the discussion at the same time that we wouldn’t tell anyone that we were trying. We really didn’t want people asking us all the time “you guys pregnant yet?” “When are you going to start trying?” “Don’t you know how that works?” I’ve never understood why people think they have the right to ask those kind of questions – it’s not like I go up to them and ask them how their sex life is. During the 3 1/2 years of NOT telling many people I’ve always had to shrug that question off…when inside I really wanted to answer something along the lines of ‘Well, maybe we’re not having sex the right way, do you want to come and show us how it’s done?” But I don’t, because it’s rude! oh well…. Back to the story….
So we start trying to get pregnant. We both start taking really good vitamins, eating healthier etc… And then Brian loses his job right before our 1 year anniversary. Thankfully he ended up getting a new job but it was in Missouri (At this time we were still living in Michigan) So that caused a little bit of a problem. But I faithfully traveled from Michigan to Missouri every 2 weeks to see him, and hopefully get pregnant. But it didn’t happen. 9 months later I moved to Missouri with my husband (YAY!) and we continued to try. (This was March 2010 – so we’ve “officially” been trying for one year, but it was a little “hit and miss” for a few months)
September 2010 – I found a FANTASTIC Doctor and she FINALLY diagnosed me with PCOS – something that I had thought I had for quite a while, but I couldn’t get a doctor to diagnose me with it. She started me on metformin, and wanted to see what me being on that for a few months would do. Her plan was to start me on Clomid in January of 2011.
In December of 2010 I traveled to see a friend who had recently had a miscarriage. She was explaining in detail what happened when she passed the baby, and it was like she was telling me my story. It was weird. I will never know 100% sure if the doctors were right or wrong, and let me tell you – that drives me NUTS, so all I can do is wonder. Maybe it was a cyst? Maybe it was a Miscarriage….only God knows for sure.
Then in January of 2011 we moved to Iowa for Brian’s job – so that meant new doctors, and well, to say the least, finding a good one was VERY difficult in Iowa.
*Look for Part 3 coming soon!*
Make it a GRATE Day!